Went to an amazing rock formation today, called the Bonnet Stone (or Stane for those who prefer not to spell correctly). This is a block of sandstone eroded by the elements into a very precarious-looking lump on a sort of stalk. I have no idea how long it takes to form such a thing, but the weather and the inexpert name-carving litho-terrorists or visitors continue to take their toll, and it may soon be named the Rocky Outcrop formerly known as the Bonnet Stone. For anyone who wants to go there, it is located on the North Western slope of West Lomond, in Fife, Scotland. The OS grid reference is NO 18974 07067 as far as I could GPS it. You would think such a thing would be remote and hard to access, but that is far from the case. OK, you have to be a bit of an outdoor freak, because the nearest car park is - oh, let's see - approximately 0.8 of a mile from the stone, and unless you have off-road wheels, you'll need to walk up the gently-sloping track. There are no shops or toilets on the way (nearest approx 2 miles) so be prepared. Good mobile phone reception though, so you can always keep in touch with base camp.
Since I've already done it for you, I don't suppose you'll feel the need to go in person, but in case you do, here's the easiest way. Drive to the village of Gateside on the A91. Take a small road marked Station Road (so named apparently because there was once a railway station there) which heads southeast off the main road (on the opposite side from - but before - the Perth [A912] turnoff if approaching from the West / M90 direction, after it if approaching from Cupar). Follow this road for approx 0.7 of a mile to a Tee Junction, where your choices are limited to left and right. Choose right - the parking place is on your left after about 150 yards. Get out of the car. Walk up the signposted track. Enjoy. Take a lolipop stick to pick the sheep and cow doodoo out the soles of your shoes before re-entering your vehicle.
Went back to visit the Bonnet Stone earlier this month, and the good news is that it's still there in all its glory. The bad news is that it has acquired a poem (yes, A POEM) on a metal plaque on the fencepost nearby. What's that all about then? I can just imagine the stone thinking to itself "Well, I've been here pretty much unchanged for many thousands of years, but I can't help thinking I'm missing something vital to realise the full multimedia experience of all those who come to see me. I wonder what it is. Oh, I know - a poem - that'll do the trick. Now I am complete."
The poem goes nothing like this.
In Fife stands a stone called The Bonnet With symbols and words carved upon it It thinks "What I need Is something to read I do hope they plaque me a sonnet"
Or picture this scene.
A typical Scottish household during Saturday afternoon quality time.
Father: "I wonder what activity I could undertake to
fulfil my yearning for experiences geological".
Mother: "What I could really do with right now is some poetry on a plaque".
Both: "Lets go to the Bonnet Stone, that we may both be enriched".
Yeah.
The really scary thing is that someone probably gets paid to think up and implement these things (and probably, ultimately, with our money). Talk about gilding the lily. We eagerly await the Kirkcaldy Heritage Festival of Crayons through the Ages, supported by a generous grant from public funds no doubt. Anyway, that's quite enough ranting for the moment - I'm steering perilously close to expressing an opinion. Here's the pictures.
